If you ever taught, you know this kid.

He is the one who would have been the bravest and done the most damage “if he had been there”. You name the event, the war, the riot, the fight, the persecution; if he had been there, he would have led the charge and done the bravest and most damaging act.

But he wasn’t, so his tough talk is a safe brag.

He is the kid who runs to be the first in the ring forming around a potential cafeteria fight, yelling, “Fight. Fight. Fight” to get things going, but stays in the second row to avoid any fight overflow, and is the first to take off when a teacher shows up.

He is the kid who only issues a challenge that could result in a fight as long as there is an adult nearby who can prevent any possible fighting, and then brags about how tough he would have been if the fight had happened.

He is the kid in the neighborhood whose mother always seems to call when his participation in a fight is prevented by that.

He is the kid who is always encouraging others to resolve their differences with fists.

But he never fights, can always get out of a fight, and never gets involved in one himself.

He is the kid who lives his machismo through vicarious experience.

He does not engage physically or verbally because he fears pain, but he spreads rumors, or does not quell those he could, so that he can see other people fight each other for his entertainment.

And, if he does actually do something that should come back on him, he deflects attention toward someone else, or simply out right blames others for what he has himself done.

He lives in a world based on bragging that if only circumstances had been different, what a terror he would have been.

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He avoided the draft multiple times, once because of bone spurs on a foot he could not point to when he was asked on video which one had them.

But he loves to talk tough, drop bombs, threaten other countries with our troops, other people’s children, but never his own. He surrounds himself with men in uniform, and smirks his support of the troops.

Someone handed him his Purple Heart won during his service, and the president proclaimed he always wanted one of those, forgetting that people are aware he did everything to avoid being in a position to earn one.

He watched the events of 9/11 from his midtown tower and then collected money from the 9/11 fund to repair supposed damage to his building. He condemned Muslims in New Jersey who supposedly celebrated the attack, claiming he had been a witness to this, but had been watching coverage on television where this was not shown.

He talked tough on Mexico’s paying for his wall, but choked when he met the president.

He was tough on China until, over a chocolate cake and face to face with that country’s president, he decided China was okay.

He told people at his campaign rallies to rough opponents up and that he would pay for their legal fees, but then claims, in spite of video and audio evidence, that he never did that.

He is caught making fun of a handicapped reporter for applause, and denies that too.

He has been surrounded by security and expensive lawyers most of his life, and then tells police officers to be tough on people they arrest, setting up, thereby, an implied adversarial relationship between police and the communities they patrol, and will most likely use any reaction to police brutality as a tool to show how his tough talk should be followed.

He sets up our troops and police for harm, and hides at his golf courses when he has work to do.

He is the kid who, while talking tough and daring anyone to come at him, is making sure he knows where the nearest exit is.

He is a man stuck in middle school without any awareness that his peers have grown up.