As I was sitting across the desk from the deputy superintendent and explaining why the inclusion of Gay Students in school district policies on bullying, harassment, and nondiscrimination must be made clear and not left up to the assumptions of students, parents, and employees on whatever level, he pointed out the obvious that as a large man he had been a “fat kid” in middle school and had to face the hurtful taunts of his peers.

His concern was, that while we might make Gay student protection clearly included, what about the “fat kid”, the left-handed kid, and the kid who might have two different colored eyes?

I had to explain that I was not excluding them as I did not write school district policy, but, having something in common with the Gay kids, and having seen how they were being treated and talked about, that was the group I had chosen to advocate for while he, being able to speak from experience for the “fat kid”, should take whatever actions he thought necessary for their benefit.

As time went on, and I was in a position to propose inclusive language, for experimental purposes I accepted the compromise that the words “or for any other reason” be added to the end of the list of protected classes the district insisted they had to use as it was the federal Department of Education’s nondiscrimination list.  This was the list that included race, color, religion, national origin etc.

However as was to be expected, although, as all concerned continued to follow the original list with the new words added, Gay students continued to be subjected to the negative treatment and attitudes that I had attempted to end, or at least reduce.

This required going back and demanding the more explicitly inclusive language so as to remove any doubts or reluctance to include them.

At no time did I state that while I was concerned about the Gay students no one else deserved the protections from bullying, harassment, and discrimination. I had, after all, proposed the language “or for any other reason”, but I was concentrating on adding the words “sexual orientation” because that is the group with which I had identified.

When I was again asked about the “fat kid”, the left handed kid, and the kid with two colored eyes, I pointed out that I could offer a phrase that represented  the group for whom I was advocating while they, obviously, being concerned about and seeing a need to include the “fat kid”, the left handed kid, and the kid with two colored eyes, should not deny the protections I was seeking for my group,  but should find a way to include those they had such a concern about.

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I see this with Black lives Matter.

This is a group that chose a particular constituency because they saw a need for advocating for it.

They are not excluding anyone else, but like anyone in advocacy, they are being practical and pointed.

If all lives matter, what is the objection to members of one group making the point that theirs do?

If you see a need to point out that Asian Lives Matter, “Fat kids’” lives matter, left handed kids lives matter, that people with two colored eyes lives matter, and Blue lives matter, then advocate for them.

Don’t find fault with people advocating for a group with which they identify while being too lazy to advocate for your own group.

If the deputy superintendent was so aware of the bullying and harassment faced by “fat kids”, why had he chosen to do nothing to address that, and continue to deny protections to others?

Would it not have been better to take action so both groups, instead of none, would not have to face those problems?