During the days I was advocating to have “Sexual Orientation” added to Oklahoma City school student policies that dealt with Bullying, Harassment, and Nondiscrimination, there were people within the Gay Community who just drove me crazy.
I had expected a great deal of push back from school district administrators who for religious, political, and personal reasons would be vehemently opposed to making the inclusion of GLBT kids in those policies stated as opposed to implied or assumed, and I was not disappointed.
I had to make sure I did not buy the promises of future action in exchange for patience now. On more than one occasion I was advised by more than one administrator to be patient and wait until that somewhere down the road moment when the district would be ready to add the words, something I refused to do since the bullying and harassing of the GLBT students was happening at the time, and not somewhere down the road.
What made me have to regroup, however, was when members of the GLBT Community, some in positions of influence who could have made the progress swifter, either bought into the reluctance and the cautions to accept it, found excuses to justify it, or played roles that slowed progress because that was to their advantage.
Recently in the news there was the story of the Gay real estate moguls in New York who had a small gathering for Ted Cruz, and who number among their close associates people who work for Ted Cruz as advisers, and who are also Gay.
The majority of Gay people are stuck in place. They have to live, work, and survive where they are without the benefit of being able to move away or pick and choose the society in which they move, and cannot easily move away from those who mistreat them or hold the community down.
They have to deal with where they are.
But I know some members of the so called A-List Gays who, while they are able to associate with people where they choose to do that, and who are acceptable because political donations are a great equalizer, although there is actually no deep pay back, trade what they need and what their fellow GLBT Community members need for crumbs that are thrown their way, crumbs that buy them off because it saves their income, lets them hobnob, and buys their support.
I have had to deal with those who, while being in a position to help make change, either obstructed the progress because doing so had a personal payoff, or who actually colluded in the down the road approach because it was uncomfortable for them in the now.
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One such even objected to compromise language in the school policies after having prevented stronger language, or any language for that matter, and then attempted to assume the role of the more resolute person, and the greater one, by objecting to the compromise as a sell out when the wording she refused to support was what she claimed she had been demanding. She condemned the compromise that was necessitated by her collusion and reluctance to speak when it had been necessary for her to have done so.
I have watched when promises were made that sounded good, but which had no follow through. I was told things that were supposed to make me happy enough to have me fooled into backing off. I didn’t, but I know some can be fooled by the assurance of doing what the GLBT Community asks for, and then when quiet and relaxed are given nothing.
The assumption is that we are too stupid to catch on, and, sadly, some are.
I was at meetings where individuals with connections informed politicians that they were the official voices of the GLBT Community and the ones to whom the politicians must listen, but who then kept quiet as they attended the social events that were covered in the society section of the local paper and were in pictures with the people who were keeping the GLBT Community down.
They were doing very well while progress was put off for that sometime down the road moment.
They have since moved on, and are doing quite well.
The best ruse is to promise the GLBT Community that their needs and rights will be met, and when it relaxes and waits, simply do nothing.
And the worst enemies are those among us who let this happen because it is to their advantage, and those among us who fall for this repeatedly.
As far as those guys in New York, I never met them, but I certainly know them.